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Kicking Crowell While He's Down

May 5, 2019

 Above: Supportive Meme from sympathetic U. of Georgia students.

 

Earlier this week, Isaiah Crowell tore his achilles tendon. Now if you're a hardcore fantasy football geek looking for value at running back, you're probably screaming "NOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

If you are anyone else on the planet..... 

 

Back in the 2011, Isaiah Crowell was one of the top college recruits in the nation according to Rivals.com. With a bright future ahead of him, Crowell signed with the University of Georgia. Despite rushing for 850 yards and being named AP's Freshman of the Year, Crowell was kicked off of the Georgia football team:

  • Felony- Weapon in a School Zone

  • Felony- Altered Weapons Charge

  • Misdemeanor- Possession of Concealed Weapon

  • Failed Drug Test

  • 2 Other Undisclosed Football Suspensions

 

Crowell landed in the FCS at Alabama State where he put up similar numbers. Instead of honing his game, he declared for the NFL Draft as soon as he was eligible....

....and went undrafted.

He signed with the Cleveland Browns for a $10,000 signing bonus and made $1,500,000....

....over the next three years combined.

Just when he started to make good NFL money, $2.7 million a season....

....the Browns went 0-16, tying the worst record in NFL History.

 

Crowell couldn't get out of Cleveland fast enough, and the Browns couldn't get rid of Crowell fast enough.* So after watching Crowell run into Joe Thomas' backside and fall down alot (before Thomas' career ending injury.) It was simply time for both sides to move on.

 

Crowell then landed with the New York Jets where the Jets would play Cleveland early in the season. After running for one of his touchdowns, he used the football to simulate cleaning himself after defecation, then threw the ball into the stands, drawing an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty

 

Crowell was fined just over $13,000 for that unsportsmanlike gesture....

.....then got an endorsement deal with Dude Wipes.

 

Just when Cowell was entering the second year of his 3-year, $12 million deal, the Jets signed La'Veon Bell...

.....and Crowell was cut almost immediately.

 

Crowell didn't want to be with the Jets anyhow, he wanted the BIG money....

....so he signed with the Las Vegas (Oakland) Raiders for $1,000,000.

 

Usually this is where I say the NFL player gets screwed again, but not this time. I taunted Crowell at the end of my last Browns article: The BEST Wide Receiver Corps (Maybe This Time)

 

You, the reader, can taunt me that I never made $9 million. Yep, you're right.

I try not to think of the $9 million that "The Crow" made. I take solace knowing that if he could have just kept on the straight and narrow and played for 4 years at Georgia, he could have made Todd Gurley money. Try to think of the $50 million that Crowell lost being a dumbass.

 

And, in three years, both Isaiah Crowell and I will be in the same tax bracket. He ain't coming back from that Achilles Tear.

*Did I mention the time he posted a hooded figure slicing a policeman's throat on social media? Crowell was very sorry.

 

Very sorry it became a news story.

 

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