Howard Stern: Don't Let the Doorknob Hit You in the Ass
Transcribed from Howard Stern's Promotion of his new HBO Max Show:
I have no greater joy in life
than knowing that I work with
great people and I come into
a company that appreciates me
who allows me the
flexibility as I get older to
put together a schedule that
I want.
It's an amazingly unique
opportunity in media
to have that kind of freedom
Sirius XM, God Bless You.
Think I'm making a transcription error? Here's the video.
At Howard Stern's peak, right before he jumped to satellite radio in 2005, he had 20 million listeners. He bitched and moaned that he was overworked and underpaid. The same argument he made with every contract that he signed after he got to New York. There were the books and the movie, but once on Sirius, Stern's audience started a slow and steady decline.
Now don't get me wrong, Howard Stern USED to be the best in the business. But after Donald Trump was elected, Stern became less about entertainment and more about proselytizing. The Wack Pack and the strippers were mostly gone, not necessarily due philosophical concerns, but because of a more limited broadcast schedule.
On terrestrial radio, Stern worked 5 days a week, but rolled up 8 weeks of vacation a year. Then, in Johnny Carson-style negotiating, he shifted his calendar to 4 days a week, then 3. When Covid hit, Stern famously didn't leave his home for 2 years. Covid should have killed the Howard Stern Show, like it offed so many restaurants and entertainment options that didn't adapt to the new rules.
You see, with every contract, the negotiating angle evolved from the new Howard Stern shows to the valuable archives, which were broadcast on a second station. During the last set of negotiations though, someone at Sirius leaked that the new Stern shows were down to around 200,000 listeners. Stern was angry that internal number got to the media, but didn't correct them with the "real" audience. Sirius quietly consolidating his two stations into one.
Sirius, which at one time was the future of radio, wobbles along not unlike Cable TV, carrying a personality that they can't afford to keep, but they also can't afford to lose-
Editor's Note: Thus the HBO Max side deal. Not unlike the greatest hits deal E! had with Stern a generation ago.
Sirius replays those old Stern shows like they're MTV and Stern is their version of Rob Dyrdek's Ridiculousness. Losing 19.8 million listeners for new shows should not be overlooked.
So for Stern to crow about how happy he is about his one-day a week schedule is almost the theatre of the absurd. He, in reality, should be embarrassed. Joe Rogan has about 11 million listeners for each new podcast.
Stern's latest act is that you should be grateful that he's still around.
Whereas HE should be grateful that he wasn't sent out to the glue factory.
Ten years ago, the Offspring sold their music catalog for $35 million.
Industry insiders arched their brows and asked, THE OFFSPRING?
Since then, band after band, including the immensely respected Bob Dylan, have sold their rights for hundreds of millions of dollars.
I guarantee you that Howard Stern is eyeing a Rock Star Deal of his own for his archives once he's done.
Editor's Note II: AI estimates that Stern's Catalog could be worth between $250 and $500 million, or about the same as what the Pink Floyd Catalog commanded.
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