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What is Lil Tay's Penalty?

Let me regale you in a story from my youth.


Back in 1993, I was all about alternative and punk music. I had heard an urban legend that an obscure punk band called the Dwarves had one their members killed after a show. I wasn't aware of the band's music, but I was intrigued by the story of the guitarist's murder. That story turned out to be inaccurate and a hoax. When bands like Green Day and the Offspring were just about to make it big, the Dwarves decided to pull a publicity stunt that effectively ended their career before it began.



L.A. Times (1993) Press Statement - "Sub Pop Records, the Seattle label that launched Nirvana, has dropped punk band the Dwarves after the group perpetrated a hoax that its guitarist had died in a bar fight in Philadelphia in April. A label spokesman says that singer Blag Dahlia provided convincing information about the supposed death of the musician, who uses the moniker HeWhoCannotBeNamed. Sub Pop even sent flowers to people Dahlia had named as the guitarist’s family, and received a thank-you note in return."


At the time, I was very surprised that Sub Pop took such a hard stanch against a punk band. I mean, a death hoax sounds like something a good punk would do, right? C'mon, they're punks! But Sub Pop wasn't amused and by the time The Dwarves had dropped their excellent album The Dwarves are Young and Good Looking in 1997, for Epitaph, the band's window had seemingly shut.


NuMetal was on the rise and the Dwarves' brand of punk was in the past. Now don't get me wrong, you can see the Dwarves in concert, today, but the only thing that kept the Dwarves from Green Day-level success was timing and a bad publicity stunt.


 

What does that have to do with today? Earlier in the week, I had read in the tabloids that "rapper" Lil Tay has died. I wasn't familiar with Lil Tay, so I moved on.


The next day, one of Lil Tay's friends confirmed Lil Tay was dead. I thought that was odd, I mean, they have coroners for that.


I said to myself "I smell a death hoax."

But then I shook my head and questioned my own sanity "why am I so jaded about absolutely everything?"


Then, just hours ago at the Daily Mail: "Lil Tay's Former Manager Believes SHE Masterminded Fake Death Announcement as a PUBLICITY STUNT - Accusing her of Lying about being Hacked to 'Rekindle' her Fame after Five-Year Absence"


Listen, Lil Tay is 14.


If Lil Tay said she died on Instagram, I blame the Daily Mail for reporting a kid's prank, but also the parents for not taking away Tay's Phone.


If there's no fake police report, there's really nothing the police can do about Tay. I could write on Beacon of Speech that I was dead, but even a cursory amount of research would reveal that I was alive.


Things like me showing up to work.


Or no death certificate.


Or the very basic premise that I wrote that I was dead ON MY OWN WEBSITE.


I mean, me typing the words "I am dead." There is a certain absurdity to it.


As much as I love the Daily Mail, they showed an AMAZING lack of journalistic integrity.


One generation ago, a death hoax killed a career.

Now a death hoax is used to re-invigorate a career?


<sigh>

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