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  • Writer's pictureFred

I'm the Man

Back in 1987, New York Musical Legends Anthrax released the I'm the Man EP. What the band didn't realize is that they had inadvertently helped to invent Rap-Metal. Surprisingly, that's not what I want to talk about today. Today, I want to talk about FUN.

Sandwiched between two pillars of modern thrash, Spreading the Disease and Among the Living, the I'm the Man single was simple fun. It was thrown together during the band's down time, merging their love of rap and their love of metal. There was no grand scheme to do anything but revel in some Sophomoric Level hijinks.

Then what are we here for? Because I'm the Man is the perfect summation of why 2020 sucks.

1987: I'm the Man is awesome.

2020: I'm the Man is still my favorite song, I would like to use the instrumental version of the song as the Beacon of Speech theme song for our upcoming reboot. How much does that cost? Only $50 a month for the amount of listeners we currently have. The more popular we become, the more we have to pay.

Any other problems? Actually there's a laundry list of problems.

  • The song features a guitar riff from the Jewish Folk Song Hava Nagila.

Are the Jews going to be pissed?

  • The song features a cut from Sam Kinison's comedy act:

Next thing you know I'm getting emails as to whether or not I've been briefed on Kinison's misogynistic act. I have.

  • The song is loaded with curse words.

Yes Karen, I know, that's why I would play the instrumental version.

  • The song includes a sound drop from Metallica's Master of Puppets where James Hetfield screams "Master."

No, he is not talking about whites being the master, the song is about drug addiction. The master in question is drugs.

  • The song includes a sample from Run DMC.

No, Anthrax was not trying cultural appropriation. Anthrax would collaborate with Public Enemy a few years later, but for their careers, they have been a thrash band (with varying levels of success.)

  • The song includes a sample from the Beastie Boys' hit Fight for Your Right (to Party!)

Yes, I know, early Beastie Boys releases have also been hit with the misogyny accusation.

  • There's a lyric that refers to El Duce.

Yes, I'm familiar with the Mentors.

So I'm going to pick a different song then?

Nope. I'm the Man is my song.

It's my Lift Every Voice and Sing.

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