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Thank You Very Much for the (Alternate Universe) Pulitzer

  • Writer: Fred
    Fred
  • 2 days ago
  • 5 min read

Last week, M. Gessen won the Pulitzer for Opinion Writing.


Their writing was woke garbage. A week later I'm still really sour about it.


But then today, I saw this story at DNYUZ: New Theory Suggests That Alternate Universe Versions Of You Are Determining Your Fate


And I thought to myself, "Yeah, that's the ticket! Alternate Universe Fred WON the Pulitzer last week. Here's my acceptance speech:




How do I feel after my surprising showing in Opinion Writing? Not really sure.


Since Trump has been re-elected, I have been really annoyed. And this isn't even about Trump per se, it's about the horrible Squad on the Left as much as it is about the terrible Trumpies on the Right. Partisanship has run amok in this country and if I had a say, we'd de-platform both corporate political parties. I feel like Sam Neil in the 1995 horror film In the Mouth of Madness, the world turned to shit and I'm the only non-partisan writer in a partisan world.


Here were our entries:

September 23, 2025 - The New American Crusades


With that being said:

Thanks to my Mom - She helped me with her support and her proof-reading skills.

Thanks to Ted K - When someone talks, someone has to listen. Ted got that crappy job.

Thanks to Joe K - Hopefully you'll get paid someday.

Thanks to Cliff - You Rock!

Thanks to cleveland.com - I tell Ted all the time, everyone needs a cartoon nemesis to keep them sharp.

Thanks to my Day Job: At bare minimum, you did not fire me when I went deaf.

Thanks to Dr. Walter Roberts, formerly of Minnesota State University - During my failed attempt at grad school, he said "the only person who stops Fred Hunt is Fred Hunt." He was prophetic.


Finally, thanks to my Wife: She did not divorce me.

Thanks to my Father-in-Law: For not making my wife divorce me.

Thanks to my Kids: They did not openly mock me.


Editor's Note: Not only am I the primary writer at Beacon of Speech, but on the few articles that aren't mine, I was the editor.


Editor Fred wants to thank a few more people:

Thanks to Kenny Havoc - You're a good kid. I wish you the brightest of futures.

Thanks to TopTenz - I can barely manage my own site, I can't even imagine what you had to wade through back in the day.

Thanks to WhatFinger - Our most well-read articles were through their aggregate.

Thanks to Jan - She didn't sue when we stole A LOT of her art.

Thanks to both Parents for support through health struggles.


Now since some of you may never stop by our website again, I want to specifically thank you for your time. If you want a good cross-section of what we do, here's a sample from some of our 1,500 articles that I'm particularly fond of:



Highlighted: The Rioting Line was my favorite piece that I ever wrote. I think The Maximum Wage was the best.


And, finally, many on the judge's commission for the Pulitzer were from Columbia University. All of you long time readers know who we'd like to thank from Columbia.....the guys (and gal) from ALICE DONUT!!!!!







Addendum: My kid was on the radio version of Academic Challenge two years ago. One of his questions: What Literary Prize was established in 1917 for American Authors? My 18-year-old shrugged his shoulders and his team missed the question.


I almost threw my phone at him from the audience.


Addendum II: When I was my kid's age, I remember thinking that the American Literature Book in high school was mostly tripe. The only author I enjoyed was Mike Royko. I did not realize at the time that Royko had won this category in 1972.


Addendum III: So I googled: Last Pulitzer Winner from Cleveland, Ohio and the results came up with Connie Schultz in 2005. As a Cleveland State Alum, I am keenly aware of my Northeast Ohio Prism. Very surprised it's been over 20 years since a Clevelander won.

  • Connie Schultz is still around...not in Cleveland, mind you, but her Substack exists. It's a very nice Substack.

  • The best article I ever read was called Asphalt Junkie by Scott Raab. It was the story of Kevin Mackey and the Cleveland State Vikings basketball team. I was stunned Raab never won a Pulitzer.

  • Also surprised cartoonist Derf Backderf never won a Pulitzer for The City.

  • Our politics don't align, but I'm a big fan of Sam Allard at Axios, formerly of Scene Magazine. I hope he's the new editor at cleveland.com one day.

  • Troy Smith at Axios is a walking musical encyclopedia, not sure how he didn't win a Pulitzer for Criticism. (Even if he does have an unusual attachment to Kraftwerk.)


Addendum IV: Behind the scenes hasn't exactly been great.....



The Pulitzer made me feel (marginally) better.


Addendum V: Part of the reason I started the blog in the first place was because I made an independent film that no one watched. Here was the article promoting the movie.




You say I can't give myself a made-up Pulitzer?


Why not? The guy I lost to made up a Trans Genocide because of the X notation on a passport.

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